#165 Comments from Ed(itor) Gray

Ed Gray has been a great asset in my life.  Not only as the entire reason why Eiko was edited, converted and published, but also as a sort of mentor in my life.  Since working together on the Eiko novelization, Ed has shared with me much of his prowess as both an author, screenwriter and as an editor; advice that is greatly appreciated and never too harsh but still possessing enough kindness and charm to not tell you that your work is trash.  

 Below is one of his bits of sagely editing advice to me after reading my long suffering attempt at writing a fantasy epic.

Ashes

You're a natural storyteller and it shows here. You create a whole world populated by intriguing characters in fascinating circumstances.

The problem is that your writing craft needs work. From the beginning you shift randomly between present and past tense, often in the same paragraph. You drop apostrophes ("its" when it should be "it's"; "your" when it should "you're"; etc.) and insert them when they shouldn't be there. You're far from alone here; it's a common weakness. And here's a tip on getting the apostrophe right: Every time you read or write one, expand it. When you see "it's" say it as "it is." That way you'll read "it's mine" as "it is mine" (good) and "find you're way" as "find you are way" (not so good).

The problem is this: A writer can get away with sloppy usage in a screenplay, especially at AS, because screenplay readers are looking for a story they know they're going to get rewritten anyway.  But that's not true in a novel; it's the final product.  Fiction readers, even ones who can't write a coherent sentence, are put off by it just as moviegoers are put off by poor lighting, bad sound and flat acting. And more important, acquiring editors won't read another word once they see it in a manuscript. It's just too much work to fix, so they pass and move on. If you want to sell a novel, either to an editor or to a reader, it has to be cleanly written. They'll stop reading if it isn't.

So here's my advice: Since you've got the gift of storytelling (and trust me, it's a rare one), you should embark on a quest to acquire the writing skills to support that gift. Start by reading multiple books that are popular and successful in the genre, and noticing every sentence when you do. When you write prose, do it in Word with grammar check turned on, and then stop and think about every word choice it underlines. When you write anything else --Tweets, emails, grocery lists -- always (ALWAYS) stop and reread the whole thing before you send it. If it's longer than a sentence or two, print it out and read it; you'll see how much more you catch that way.

Bottom line: Right now I'd split my time between applying the specific fixes to KFD and your longer-term quest to hone your prose writing. Both should pay off.

Naturally Ed is right.  I've long since realized that I have very specific weaknesses, tense is one of the biggest ones.  Yet I know that the wisdom that Ed has is being shared with me, and I'd be foolish not to listen.  I'm still struggling with the tense problem, as like termites; it is invasive in everything that I do.  Of course the other one is more easily fixed.  Dropping apostrophes is as he said; a common thing.  It's an easier weakness to fix. 

Once you have acknowledged a weakness you can learn to defeat it.  

Ed Gray, with his wife Rebecca, founded Gray's Sporting Journal in 1975, and was its editor for 16 years. He is the author of ten books and numerous magazine articles and essays.

http://graybookspublishers.com